card trick

Jul. 21st, 2011 09:37 pm
kerpingtack: google image of stained glass (candy floss)
Finishing an old entry on impulse. Really really long ramble about narratives, trying to change, and RPF. Completely unreadable, pls don't feel obligated AT ALL to go through it lol.

endless wonder )

hongur

Feb. 17th, 2011 05:43 pm
kerpingtack: badly cropped deers drawn by a korean artist (nearly spring)
I end my at 5 or 6 everyday but lately I've been staying on campus until ~8 to avoid the traffic. The bus ride back on Monday night was legit hell. It usually takes 20 minutes without traffic, 40-50 minutes with. On Monday it took a FUCKING HOUR to get, like, ONE-THIRD of the way. It was hell. I just got off at the Wilshire stop and walked back. It took like half an hour which was, guaranteed, at least an hour sooner than the bus. Good god.

I went to the art party thing which was a mistake. It was all hipstered out with music playing and shit and an art exhibit that was basically someone's tumblr collages. Seriously, it was collages with magazine cutouts pasted on notebook paper. wtf. I'm not saying that's not artistic or creative, but what is the criteria for getting that in an exhibit? There was no free food but I did get a free soda out of it. LOL I was meant to be mingling with my hip social peers and the only social interaction I had was with the middle-aged security guard who told me she liked my shoes and we talked about Payless for like a minute. Whatever, she was nice. Also there was a Subway nearby so after fifteen minutes I said fuck it and went there and bought a foot-long BLT and ate it while waiting for the bus. omnomnom

ALSO LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL I got like the maximum grade under my incompetent Scottish TA's curve for my soash of crime midterm. The one for which I did like 10% of the reading and stayed up all night via energy drink and went in SO fucking half-assed. LOL JESUS CHRIST. This is why I cannot take school seriously. I fucking KNOW that I knew nothing, and continue to know nothing. BUT I GOT THE HIGHEST GRADE POSSIBLE. WTF WHY CAN THIS EDUCATION SYSTEM NOT DETECT INCOMPETENCY?

JJB has a youtube account (yeah, I know) and he uploads videos of his Beyblades fighting. (Beyblades are like metal...ish spinning tops. You spin them against each other in a plastic bowl ~stadium~ and try to knock the other out. It's very intuitively enjoyable, just fun to watch.) It's so adorable. "A battle between Hasbro's Legend Beyblades. I'm going to start using Windows Movie Maker soon!" AWW. omg I can't believe he's already 10 years old. And this generation is so knowledgeable about the internet. It's strange.

ARGH I'M SO FUCKING HUNGRY.
kerpingtack: illustration for aladdin 1928 "Aladdin Saluted Her with Joy" (salut her with joy)
Man I really didn't realize just how popular SNSD was. I mean, I knew they were popular and beloved, but I thought it was like a generalized girl group popularity, even if they're at the top of that particular heap, and I was worried that they'd drop out of public favor and disband and be forgotten. OMG that's not going to happen anytime soon, AT ALL. They're the first girl group to ever win the Album Daesang award (which is like The Big Award I guess?? the Korean music industry is kind of shambling, they have like twelve different charts and different companies boycott different awards shows, etc. but I know this is a big deal!!) and the first artist ever to win both the Album Daesang and the Digital Music Daesang. They are so loved. Look at this fancam, they were so not expecting it. Everyone looks genuinely shocked. Taeyeon crying, she doesn't usually cry. The way they pull each other in for a hug at the end. ;____;

;____; i say ;____; )

Oh man, when they first debuted they had a lot of stupid little controversies that were just people giving them shit for no reason. In 2008 a bunch of fan clubs for other bands got together and decided to "boycott" them during the Dream Concert, so when SNSD went on stage like the whole stadium turned off their glowsticks and stayed silent the entire performance. Shit like that. But now they're really number one in the whole country, not just among girl groups or idols, and they're so down-to-earth and funny and kind and they really love one another. Oh man. I'm so soft inside right now. SOSHI FOREVER YOU GUYS

http://oi38.tinypic.com/xqcljo.jpg
kerpingtack: badly cropped deers drawn by a korean artist (nearly spring)
My five days of torture turned out to be unnecessarily grim, as everyone had guessed, because I passed! the! class! YES! The professor was concerned about plagiarism, but not the accidental kind, and after she determined from my sea of babbling that I knew the subject matter enough to have written the paper, she told me that I was in the clear and would receive a B- for the class. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

So many people were concerned about me and checked up on me throughout the day, including my therapist/counselor who asked if she could call me after the meeting to see how I was, which was really really really nice of her. I called my mom who was happy for me, and my bost frond who was happy for me too, and so were my sister and my cousin and my therapist. I came back to the cool and empty apartment, hungry and happy and sleepy for the first time in days, and I ate a marathon of food while reading a good book. I felt safe and loved in the family of things.* I still do. It is a good feeling.

Urgh I wish I could delete my extra Skype names. I hate having extraneous accounts.

For what it's worth, I am really happy at the moment, but it feels a little shaky and delirious, like in just a couple of paces I'll be sad again. 

MY FAVORITE GAME TO PLAY is WHAT WOULD I MOST LIKE TO EAT RIGHT NOW?!?!? It is inherently depressing but good for organizing the soul. I would most like to eat tri-tip with warm soft French bread, potato salad, chicken salad with walnuts, apples, and bleu cheese dressing, and fruit punch. God that sounds good. I WANT TO HAS EATS NOW.

Inception has suuuch good fic, om nom nom. Still haven't seen it yet! And it makes me anxious to see everyone falling in love with Joseph Gordon-Levitt. I don't know why this unsettles me! Maybe it feels like I should be falling in love with him too. But I don't want to be all capsy and stuff, I just want to appreciate his fine acting (FOR REAL) and what an ultimate fantasy boyfrond he is. He'd be such a cool person to know. I like his dimples. Fine, maybe I'm already a little in love. Tra la la~

It was really hot today and it will only get hotter. Monday's high will be 99. WHAT THE FUCK.

*NOW THAT I AM TERRIFIED OF  NOT CITING THINGS: this is from Wild Geese by Mary Oliver, on which I imprinted something fierce when I was sixteen.
kerpingtack: corgis on the beach where the corgis are free (Default)
I AM GOING BONKERS OMG WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME

IF I CANNOT FINISH THIS PAPER TODAY

I WILL

LITERALLY

DIE

WHY IS THIS SO HARD, I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON THIS CONTINUOUSLY LIKE NIGHT AND DAY FOR TWO WEEKS AND IT IS STILL NOT FINISHED AND IT IS ONLY SUPPOSED TO BE 6 - 10 PAGES DOUBLE-SPACED WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME

AND NOW MY EARS ARE RINGING!!! GREAT I GUESS I'M GOING TO HAVE A STROKE OR SOMETHING THAT IS GREAT

THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE 5 HOURS OF SLEEP I'VE BEEN AVERAGING FOR THE PAST WEEK OR THE CAN OF CHERRY COKE I JUST DRANK

CAPS CAPS CAPS

I AM SO SAD IN MY HEART RIGHT NOW!!!!!!! THIS PAPER IS NEVER GOING TO BE FINISHED 

LOOK AT ALL MY TAGS, I HOPE THEY ARE AS LONG AS THE ACTUAL ENTRY

WHY DO I HAVE SO MANY AND WHY ARE THEY ALL SO RELEVANT

HOBO CORN

OBAMA'S ICY GLAMOUR

BILLY IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE
kerpingtack: sarah with a fine moustache (sarah thinks you look ridiculous)
Normally I wouldn't capitalize all the words because you aren't supposed to do that in Fronch but the band is not really French, so ~I just capitalize the way I feel~

I've been sick for a couple of days now even though I was asleep more than I was awake for the same couple of days. The cumulative effect is that I feel like I've been asleep longer than I've been alive. I'm just so tired. I haven't eaten anything all day and yesterday I basically had a waffle and a few strawberries, ende.

I think my flash drive is broken. I am so dead inside right now. I had ALL my pictures on there. ALL OF THEM. You guys don't understand, I save EVERYTHING. There was a fucking CATACOMB of folders in that drive. I'M SO DEAD INSIDE. I have most everything backed up from April 2009, but that's almost a year ago. I KNEW I SHOULD'VE BEEN MORE PARANOID

MELANCHOLY

I'm lonely from all the things I don't understand, experience, appreciate, etc. From the time I was in the throes of pre-adolescent fuckery, I wanted to be a thousand different things at once so I ended up being nothing. Depression = paralyzed with hope (tm Maria Bamford).

Plus, I'm super crazy. I've been going to my mom's office to "help" with work (actually I'm useless) and my mom told me the other day that her boss said I was pretty (not in a creepy way). I was flattered for a second before I thought MAYBE SHE MADE THAT UP TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER ABOUT BEING UGLY. These days I even know I'm not ugly most of the time, so where did that thought come from? Unending paranoia I suppose.

om nom nom new fandom om nom nom Sherlock Holmes om nom nom Jude Law

Half the time he looks like a fucking serial killer and the other half he just looks like an asshole. Nevertheless he is honestly very good at being very beautiful. *____*

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Let's get this out of the way: this fucker is AMAZING in the face. 

DAMN STRAIGHT IT'S A PICSPAM )

In closing,
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GODDAMN
kerpingtack: alec baldwin in beetlejuice (CHEKRD SHRT + GLASSES = YES YES YES!!)
I'm usually done at 2 on Fridays, but since I missed work on Tuesday I had to make up my hours and I had to stay until 6. I've been riding the Student Disabilities bus back to the apt for the past week, but they stop giving rides at 5 on Fridays. So I thought, okay I'll take the CSO Evening Service Van BUT THEY DON'T EVEN WORK ON FRIDAYS. So it's 6 o'clock, I'm tired, and I'm looking at going all the way from YRL to the apt. HERE IS A DEMONSTRATIVE PICTURE


don't stalk me )


THAT IS A FUCKING LONG WAY, OKAY? That map doesn't even show how many fucking stairs and hills there are. Strathmore is a steep bitch. I had already hobbled from Ashe to YRL, which is barely even half the distance of YRL --> apt, and that seriously took me 35 minutes. I was so wiped out afterward. Plus I had memories of going from Ashe --> apt on Monday, which, granted, was the first day on crutches so it's not the best standard. But that trip took me 45 minutes and I seriously almost cried from exhaustion.

So I was like FUCK!! and really exhausted and sadcat. I went to the Anderson School of Business, which is not the fastest way to cut through campus but it was marginally easier because they have an elevator, so I didn't have to go down the big hills or the millions of stair clusters littering the way to Bruin Walk. At the lobby of Anderson there was all this leftover food from whatever hoohah they were having (I don't understand business at all), and there was almost no one there, so I hella loitered around for like 20 minutes snitching carrot sticks and crackers and a bottle of water and 3 cans of soda. Ummm. LOL me and this one guy just wouldn't leave! Anyway at one point one of the people who floated through was all "must be hard getting around campus" and I was like "LOL YEAH I'M ACTUALLY TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET HOAM IN BTWN BITES OF STOLEN CARROT STICKS" and he was all "... wot do you mean, you're trying to figure out how to get home?" and I was like "LULZ I THINK I'M JUST GOING TO WALK, IT'LL ONLY TAKE ME TWO HOURS" and he went :/ and floated out.

Ten minutes later I decided to finally get going and waited by the elevator. The man was there too and he asked if I had a ride yet and I was all "ummmmmmmm." He asked where I was going and he said he could take me. Ahahahaa I knoooow not a good idea but I really didn't want to walk and he seemed nice so I just went OMG REALLY? In the parking lot (where I was FOLLOWING HIM TO HIS CAR LOL) I was like this could be a very very bad idea. But he told me he was a professor so somehow that made it Okay in my head. LULZ HE HAD A JAGUAR.

It was fucking cool though! He was just a nice dude, but not like nice-friendly which would've made me kind of uncomfortable, it was just badass-nice, like whatever, dropping you off is like dropping off a sack of potatoes, ain't no thing but a chicken wing. We talked a little and I don't think I came off too badly even though he is a business/finance professor and I am... myself. Hahahah amazing, I didn't have to walk AT ALL and it was completely non-creepery. AMAZING! FIST BUMPS OF LOVE AND PEACE, HAAAAAALE YES!
kerpingtack: corgis on the beach where the corgis are free (Default)
I've had a pretty bad day UNTIL the walk hoam!!!!!!!! First, this really pretty British girl stopped me to ask for directions, which of course I couldn't give, BUT!!!! I was still SOMEWHAT USEFUL, which NEVER HAPPENS!!! EVER!!!!! Because, and I don't know HOW I remembered this, much less voiced it normally since my brain completely goes blank whenever anyone talks to me, I said that she could check the computers in Ackerman if she wanted. YEAH!!! THAT WAS USEFUL!!!

THEN!!!!!! While I was going up the hill this hippie guy asked me if Powell library was still open, and again, I didn't know, but Hippie Guy was A-OKAY with that!!!! He said I was FRIENDLY (ME!!!!!! FRIENDLY!!!!!!) and he held up his hand for A FIST BUMP!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A FIST BUMP!!!!! And then he thanked me and went on his hippie guy way!!!!!!!

ALL OF THIS IS A BIG FUCKING DEAL FOR ME, I NEVER HAVE NON-FAILURE SOCIAL INTERACTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!

MOR SPAM

Aug. 17th, 2006 08:42 pm
kerpingtack: corgis on the beach where the corgis are free (Default)
These past two days have been a whirlwind of... stuff. Okay not really. It's just like a farce. There are several reasons for this:
a) Julian talks
b) a lot
c) sometimes we look at him when he talks and we have to SEE him
d) with his pixie haircut with bangs and pointed sideburns
e) and Alyssa's old shirt with a picture of two kitties and the caption CATTITUDE that she wore in third grade and is very much designed for a girl
- somehow this shirt is funnier than the Pokemon shirt that likes to wear, the pink girls' one with the capped sleeves and Pikachu bouncing in the middle

"Come ahhhhhnn and look or I won't give you a special surprise~~" (tone gradually escalates until sentence becomes high buzzing squeak)
"We're not buddies, we're radicals!"
"Hey robber, let's use a laser beam fight."
*holding a man in front of a car* "Now don't move..."
*writhing on the floor, clutching my chair* "I'm... your buddy... but I cannot... move one of my... legs."

Also, my mom bought a bag of confetti candy from Trader Joe's. This led to our one attempt at Being Fancy.

Alyssa: You know how some houses have little bowls of candy lying around?
Me: :D
Alyssa: :D *pours candy into tiny crystal basin*
Me: :D I feel so fancy!
Alyssa: :D I know!
Me and Alyssa: *squealing*
Alyssa: :D I'll go put this in the living room!
[The living and dining room are the only rooms in the house that are remotely nice-looking. The rest of the house isn't hideous or anything, just very... 'lived-in.']
a few moments later
Alyssa: *returns* Somehow... it doesn't look quite right next to that... Egyptian brown phone thing and the bonsai tree.
Me and Alyssa: *go to living room*
Me and Alyssa: *stare sadly*

And it doesn't.

We were so close.

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kerpingtack: corgis on the beach where the corgis are free (Default)
counting at war

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