Dec. 5th, 2013

kerpingtack: dolphin cow jumping out of the water together as you do (omg.)
Copy+pasted from twitter for posterity:

[last night]

cries, i dashed my head against the stair banister while swooping down to smooch tom tom ;;;; [melon's brother, who is staying with us while his owners are out of town on and off]

and earlier when i was getting dressed after my shower i mistook my tights for a shirt and tried to stick my arms in. it was so confusing. the world is so hurtful and tricky. pineapple hurt mouth ; n ;
 
[today]

i have a bruise on my forehead from hitting it on the banister huhuhu

i have the same approach to everything: be indecisive and non-committal abt smth i potentially want, wait long enough until i can't do anything to achieve it; then after a while, get sick of my stagnation and charge blindly into smth telling myself "just DO something"/"take a risk" but it turns out to be a disaster and then i use that as an excuse to keep hesitating.

so anyway the scarf i wanted sold out while it was rotting in my online shopping cart ; n ;

i hope everyone who calls today can hear the defeat in my voice when i answer the phone. take pity on me, make this quick

LITERALLY THE STUPIDEST PERSON POSSIBLE. the sidebar on this site disappears if you hover the mouse over it and yet i kept trying to click it over and over, feeling distraught, "WHY CAN'T I CLICK IT???"

squeedaily.tumblr.com/post/69095938934/meet-scout-yup-he-definitely-loves-his-human … "this is cute." half a second later: "i could do this too. someone take a picture of me w a phonebook on my head"

TRACING THE HISTORY OF TODAY'S DOWNWARD SPIRAL: last night i fell asleep downstairs on the rug. the cats slept next to me on the couch. at 3am i woke up disoriented. all the lights in the room were on and for some reason i was like OMG I SLEPT UNTIL CHRISTMAS, I DIDN'T EVEN BUY ANYONE PRESENTS!!!!!!!!!! then i stumbled up the stairs, brushed my teeth in a stupor for like five minutes, fell back asleep after playing candy crush a couple of times, bolted awake at 7:15 late to drop julian off at school, startling the cats who had followed me upstairs and had puddled themselves around my person, barrelled out the door, fell back asleep when i came home, OVERSLEPT AGAIN, got to work late...

I'M JJANG GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN

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