hither and yon

K got back from the BJ Novak talk, which was an hour-long Q&A session. He was so so nice, like seriously. At about 5 minutes till the end there were still tons of people raising their hands to ask questions so he said if the Campus Events Commission people still had the room, he could stay overtime, and he could hang around after and answer questions one-on-one. Plus the moderator kept interrupting him but he was super polite and nice and would finish what he was saying and respond to the mod at the end. He was hella gracious!

He was also smoking hot, for seriously. He looked really really good. It was awesome. Like. Yeah. BJ Novak, if you were in one of my classes, I would totally stare at you creepily and stalk you across campus. He was also really articulate and funny and clear and it was just really cool to listen to him.

Whot he talked about (this is so out of order it's not even funny and also I got like all the details wrong and I forgot A LOOOOOT):
- career path: Ever since he was little, he wanted to be a writer but he didn't know what kind. Later he says that he knew he wanted to be a FAMOUS kind of writer; his dad is/was a ghostwriter for political/celebrity biographies and stuff and he would be credited as "with William(?) Novak," so he was all "I kind of wanted to avenge the family name." In Harvard he wrote for the Harvard Lampoon, knowing that a lot of people went onto Hollywood from there. He wrote a parody of Full House with his friend (Dan something? I think? Question mark?) and Bob Saget saw it and etc etc he got hired as a writer for a sitcom starring M. Saget at age 21. He hated the experience, started writing in jokes they could never use, also started telling those jokes on open mike stand-up every night, and bombed every night.
- some pieces of advice he is confident about giving without feeling presumptuous/thinking he's so great and wise:
--> Write for the person next to you, not what you think is going to get you hired. (Write something that you like and would impress your friends, etc.)
--> (from his dad) Write only what you like, keep only what they like.
- Related to the advice: he would sometimes go out w/ material that he thought the audience would like and when it bombed he'd be all, "Fuck you guys, I didn't think it was funny either!" Anyway what's the point of doing this if you don't ~believe~ in it, or if you don't think it's good?
- Two sets of advice for how to break into the business: creative and professional. He thinks the professional is overemphasized. Generally the way to get noticed is to write a great script. People genuinely want good writers. If it's a pretty good one, keep working on it until it's great. Also do not underestimate messing around on the internet or whatever to make your friends laugh. But he knows how hard it is to be patient. During the year and a half when he was doing stand-up and bombing, he would be so bored that when he got stuck in traffic, he'd be all, "Yes! Traffic!" He had something to do!
- At the beginning of the season the writers get together for two months and throw out about a bagizillion (/thousands) ideas that they write down on index cards. The ones they keep are the ones they can't stop talking about, and the ones that get made are the dozen or so that Greg Daniels picks.
- His favorite episodes that he's written are the earlier ones, Diversity Day and Sexual Harassment. He loooves Diversity Day. He likes Sexual Harassment because it was where "that's what she said" originates and it features one of his favorite side characters, the lawyer P.L. Beanie (he is proud of coming up w/ that name).
- He thinks every ten years or so there's a new movie/TV show that really captures how people are actually talking, because up until then there's a run of movies imitating a movie imitating a movie imitating a movie, etc. He thinks that quality explains the success of Judd Apatow movies.
- Relatedly his dream is to make a definitive cult movie that everyone quotes until their dying day, etc. He'd be happy with that one movie.
- some jokes from his stand-up that he really loved but no one ever laughed at:
"The other day I saw a guy drinking water, with frozen water in it. I thought, that guy sure likes his water."
"The saddest idiot savant is the one who is a savant at self-awareness" (ugh I butchered this one so badly, but the punchline is there)

SIGH! Nursing my crush on BJ Novak foreverrrr now kthx.

I THINK I HAVE FOUND THE PURPOSE OF MY LIFE

RYAN/KELLY DELETED SCENES

http://www.nbc.com/The_Office/video/nod31005_alsdkfJL3j2f9f9J2.shtml#video

I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT CLIP, EVERY SINGLE CENTIMETER IT IS PERFECT I LOVE THEM

ALSO? RYAN IS SO COLD!!! HE WANTS TO GO BACK INSIDE1!! AL;KSEKJRWAEBRKLDJADSFOIEWOR ;NBD

POSSIBLY THIS IS THE 4 AM TALKING

1! I love Jenna Fischer lots.
2! Pam >>>>> Jim and always has been, please and thank you.
3! TOBY AL;kajebhrk;jbSFKLJL:KSD:LKJ TOBEEEEEE
4! Jan/Michael makes me CRY INSIDE. It just makes me SO SAD for Jan. WHAT is she DOING???? How can someone function in that kind of relationship when she has to corral his behavior CONSTANTLY like a MOM??? IT'S WEIRD. OH JAN. COLLAPSE IN ON HERSELF LIKE A DYING STAR. Oh well, it... seems to be working out alright for them. But I'm skeeved. I cannot think of a person on earth who would be a good fit for Michael with Michael also being a good fit for them. 
5! If this series ends with Jan/Toby, I swear to god my brain would overload from sheer happiness.
6! I actively dislike Kevin. I might even hate him.
7! Jim is a lame douche and can be kind of a dick. What's wrong with that guy? He's not even trying, WALLOWER. ALSO he should stop dicking Karen around.
8! I was convulsing myself into A FIT during The Negotiation cuz I was all ROOOOY and I want him and Pam to stay friends because he looks so SAD and TIRED and he's not a bad guy, he just really super isn't the right guy for Pam (even when he tried ;__;) and, uh, has a shitty temper. If he starts another rock bottom slide I want Pam to be there for him and tell him that he's better than that and he will listen because it's Pam and they will be friends YAH?! But I felt that they were both really ready to move on after that. They're going to be okay, those crazy kids. I loved that whole diner scene a lot. Oh Roy. Oh Pam. <333
9! Dwangela is the strongest, most solid relationship on the show. How did that happen? LOLLO.
10! I'm kind of mystified at people disliking Ryan. Not that he's SUPER FANTASTIQUE or anything, but just that I really don't see how he's offensive. I think this is because I am a bit like Ryan, I guess. Some people are... really offended when you don't participate in things. Or show that you really don't want to be there. I don't quite get that; it's no one's flipping business whether I like being anywhere or not, as long as I'm not rude about it. Keeping to yourself as much as possible doesn't qualify as rude. It's not my fucking obligation to pretend that I'm there for any other reason than to get through it. I'm SO SORRY if SOMETHING THAT IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS ANNOYS YOU or whatever. Hell yes, I'm projecting, and now I'm getting all riled up.

YEAH so I'm supposed to PRETEND that I'm happy and OKAY with being in whatever situation that I clearly don't like being in? Or acknowledge your existence like a fucking dog when its owner comes home? WHY? Fuck off, I'm not moaning or sighing heavily or BROADCASTING my misery or ANYTHING, I am just being as quiet and Not There as possible. I'm NOT bothering you, I don't see how this is anyone's fucking problem. WHY are people so fucking offended by you being quiet?? HOW IS THIS A PROBLEM?? I am quiet in social situations partly BECAUSE I don't want to be obtrustive. Dude, I heard Roomie's friend whining about one of her sorority sisters who didn't talk to her much. "It makes me feel like I'm not even THERE." Oh my God, am I really supposed to pander to people's rampant whorishness and reinforce their needy needy neediness and make them feel important??? Sigh, h8 headache. I just so don't understand why this bothers people. Why do we live in a world where being loud and whorish is ten thousand times more socially acceptable than keeping to yourself???? You can't fucking win sometimes.

Okay... I guess that if you were working in an office everyday in real life, a guy like Ryan wouldn't be your favorite person in the world. And maybe that's why people like Jim so much, or something. I dunno. (I've never been over the moon over him; I like the "charming, fun middle schoolish guys with just enough douche potential" type alright, and it's not the pranks I object to anything, but I'm always going to hold them at a distance.)  But I still don't see why people actively resent him. I suppose it depends on how much responsibility you put on "contribution to social situations" (I say that a lot of fucking bullshit, others take it as a mortal insult if you don't talk apparently) or... something?? I really don't understand. Maybe I'm missing something, but there's just so little Ryan shown; it's mostly "*is horrified*" and "I don't want to be here". So what are people reacting to??

Except for how he acts toward Kelly; he is a passive aggressive ass to her sometimes. But I think she's winning in the end. And he so likes her despite himself, for MYSTERIOUS reasons he cannot ever hope to understand!! He DOES, you can see it in his lazer lamp bloo eyes. Ryan is such a beaten man. He's getting sucked into the office dynamic. It's not so bad, Ryan, except for the parts that totally are.

PS, Ryan is hot.
11! I have no patience for Michael whatsoever anymore. I can't take it anymore. He is just SO HARD to like. SO HARD. Yeah yeah, he has a good heart and he's just still a lonely kid, etc, that was enough for me season 2, but I just don't have it in me!111?!?1
12! Rainn Wilson and Angela Kinsey have been more themselves as Dwight and Angela come s3. But it works!
13! I love Jenna Fischer. I <3 her so much, it's on the list twice. I bet all the talk show hosts do too. BUT MOSTLY ME. *eats a city*

HE JUST SPENT SIX MONTHS IN A LEEKY BOAT! SIX MONTHS IN A LEEKY BOAT!